"If you're holding on too tight, just let it go..."

HELLO (: Feeling really sleepy right now but I hope I don't crash like I've been doing for the entire of this week .__. I really couldn't go past 12 midnight anymore for the past few days because I would just fall asleep while doing my work. Needless to say, unproductive like madddddddddddddddd. 

Started the day off with morning footdrill (: I guess we're improving...? After the long break anyway. Jiayou NA! And then took the test for CPBS == No comments :x I guess lessons were alright, just as boring as usual and some of them were quite screwed. Like, I failed my financial literacy xD I think it's quite funny but to others, nah, failing a graded subject is only funny to a certain extent. Anyway, got back my Chemistry paper and I failed quite badly (again) and I'm so so so screwed. Mr Han talked about getting a GPA of below 2.4 and for all the previous years that I've worried for, the 2.4 mark never did hit me. Until now. I can feel it. Looking at my grades, I just don't really understand what the hell went wrong somewhere there. All I know is that I don't want a GPA of below 2.4 because I don't want to be retained and I don't want to transfer to somewhere random. I just feel so fked up because of this. In any case, it's over and I can't do shit about it anyway. 

Did the corporate video for SJ for the school video and one word: JOKE. Ugh, can't stand it, it was just so freaking retarded ;___; HAHAHA. Meh, seriously (x And the guys were frigging pissed off as well because they had to take 20 minutes to prepare their uniform and then wear them for less than 5 minutes and then wash them again xDDD OMG SOMEONE PLEASE SLAP THEM FOR BEING SO GU NIANG (((x Hahahahahahahaha so retarded (((x 

Good job 4D girls for coming in second for interclass! (: Hahaha, so proud of you guys! Especially during those really critical moments when I thought that all of you would be so stressed up or on the verge of giving up, but no, you guys pressed on even when facing strong competitors :DD I hope you guys had fun (: And as for the guys, though we lost terribly and we got last, but it's okay! It's been fun watching you guys play and I'm sure you guys gained so much from this experience (: GOOD JOB GOOD JOB GOOD JOB and thank you for fighting for 4D! (: 

I just find it quite scary that one day we'll have to grow up and then dedicate or entrust the rest of our lives to a certain someone. It's just so scary that there might be chances that people do a wrong judgement of character or that their lives just didn't turn out the way they wanted it to. How can you even accept someone so whole heartedly that you can live with them? And besides, you didn't know them from birth. What would they hide from you, and reveal after everything? Feeling so doubtful about this and even though I know I still have lots to learn and lots of time, I'm having a hunch that this is going to pose as a huge hindrance when it comes to trusting.

Lately, it's all screwing up and I can't do anything to make it better.

I know that I've been keeping people out and I don't really talk about what's really bothering me. And then I always like to wonder why no one understands or why do I feel like the loneliest person on earth. But I've realised that it takes two hands to clap, and I'm the one not letting out anything from myself. It's torturous to know that it's just me and it's just UP to me. Why can't there be someone whom I can just entrust all my feelings and words to?

NA Comptrain tomorrow :D Blog again soon~

xoxo,

me!

"If you're holding on too tight, just let it go..."

HELLO (: Feeling really sleepy right now but I hope I don't crash like I've been doing for the entire of this week .__. I really couldn't go past 12 midnight anymore for the past few days because I would just fall asleep while doing my work. Needless to say, unproductive like madddddddddddddddd. 

Started the day off with morning footdrill (: I guess we're improving...? After the long break anyway. Jiayou NA! And then took the test for CPBS == No comments :x I guess lessons were alright, just as boring as usual and some of them were quite screwed. Like, I failed my financial literacy xD I think it's quite funny but to others, nah, failing a graded subject is only funny to a certain extent. Anyway, got back my Chemistry paper and I failed quite badly (again) and I'm so so so screwed. Mr Han talked about getting a GPA of below 2.4 and for all the previous years that I've worried for, the 2.4 mark never did hit me. Until now. I can feel it. Looking at my grades, I just don't really understand what the hell went wrong somewhere there. All I know is that I don't want a GPA of below 2.4 because I don't want to be retained and I don't want to transfer to somewhere random. I just feel so fked up because of this. In any case, it's over and I can't do shit about it anyway. 

Did the corporate video for SJ for the school video and one word: JOKE. Ugh, can't stand it, it was just so freaking retarded ;___; HAHAHA. Meh, seriously (x And the guys were frigging pissed off as well because they had to take 20 minutes to prepare their uniform and then wear them for less than 5 minutes and then wash them again xDDD OMG SOMEONE PLEASE SLAP THEM FOR BEING SO GU NIANG (((x Hahahahahahahaha so retarded (((x 

Good job 4D girls for coming in second for interclass! (: Hahaha, so proud of you guys! Especially during those really critical moments when I thought that all of you would be so stressed up or on the verge of giving up, but no, you guys pressed on even when facing strong competitors :DD I hope you guys had fun (: And as for the guys, though we lost terribly and we got last, but it's okay! It's been fun watching you guys play and I'm sure you guys gained so much from this experience (: GOOD JOB GOOD JOB GOOD JOB and thank you for fighting for 4D! (: 

I just find it quite scary that one day we'll have to grow up and then dedicate or entrust the rest of our lives to a certain someone. It's just so scary that there might be chances that people do a wrong judgement of character or that their lives just didn't turn out the way they wanted it to. How can you even accept someone so whole heartedly that you can live with them? And besides, you didn't know them from birth. What would they hide from you, and reveal after everything? Feeling so doubtful about this and even though I know I still have lots to learn and lots of time, I'm having a hunch that this is going to pose as a huge hindrance when it comes to trusting.

Lately, it's all screwing up and I can't do anything to make it better.

I know that I've been keeping people out and I don't really talk about what's really bothering me. And then I always like to wonder why no one understands or why do I feel like the loneliest person on earth. But I've realised that it takes two hands to clap, and I'm the one not letting out anything from myself. It's torturous to know that it's just me and it's just UP to me. Why can't there be someone whom I can just entrust all my feelings and words to?

NA Comptrain tomorrow :D Blog again soon~

xoxo,

me!