#38 : Lights will guide you home.
Thursday, March 8, 201211:43 PM
"Don't be afraid..."
My mood was relatively passable a few moments ago but after hearing some annoying news, my morale has practically nosedived into a bottomless pit. Well, but you know, I shall get to that later because no one likes a
Okay, so fd in the morning was...average. Not much signs of improvement *sigh* but nevermind! Shall be optimistic and yeah, hopefully we will once again reach our peak during Zone Comp and do sooooo well that the judge has no choice but to give us an A+ grade :3 HEHE. Lol. And yeah, lessons were boring like crap again but guess everyone was already in the holiday mood ~ HEHE. Got back my Math quiz :DD Not bad, I got a B <3 Yay! Hahahahas. Then after school went to look for Xiner and Keane 'cause I got some random card for them and Xiner had to pass me a thumbdrive which I suddenly remembered that I have not passed it to Charlotte :X Oh shucks.
Comptrain was really fun today HAHA. The first case we did it in 10:38!!!! ^^ Omg *shrieks!!!* Hahas. First time keep to timing AND took lesser by a lot! :DDD Yay yay yay! Second case wasn't as good but also because it was more complicated and stuff ><" Hahas. Oh well. Then sat around, crapped, and then packed up time to go home. Can't really remember tiny details of today's ct but oh well, it was great. 158-ed home with Chua (:DDD) and Charlotte and then yeppp (: Oh yay. Hahas! Was gl-ed the moment I got home and things were pretty...ugly (?) but oh well, shall not dwell on that fact.
Tomorrow there is comptrain again and guess what? We're screwed. For eternity man. And Mr Lim is going to talk to our squad soon because we always don't get casualties. OH WHY WHY WHY WHY THE HELL IS IT ALWAYS LIKE THAT. And he was angry because we didn't tell him and he couldn't step in. But the thing is that, after the talk with him during our first IDT, I really don't dare to let him know if we're facing any problems because I'm afraid he will look down on us and think that my squad is incapable even though I know we can achieve many many things. And so...whenever we have this casualty problem thing, we always tell him we can handle, silently knowing we can't, but hoping for a miracle that it would be solved if we try harder. Kinda reminds me of being in self-denial. Now, we have proven ourselves wrong and Mr Lim is NOT happy. It really saddens me to see that now even a teacher has to step in for a simple thing like getting casualties. I really don't know what to do anymore. It has seriously gotten out of control. And sadly, my team along with AC will be the ones getting scolded because we have a lack of casualties. As much as I feel unjust for my team, I also want to slap myself. Why didn't we try hard enough to pull people along? What exactly did we do wrong? I don't mind getting scolded but seriously, this has to stop. The same few people keep coming down, AC goes for NC training whenever they don't have to train and vice versa. This will continue happening and we don't want that. It's just that no one really sees it, and now...we're in trouble.
Okay, shall stop...talking about such stuff here. Who knows who are reading this? Sekali Mr Lim stalks xD Hahas, hope that tomorrow would be alright :X
Please Lord, I really need you now. How do I run to you? I feel so lost.
xoxo,
ME.
